As a high-profile leader in the world of sport, Raelene Castle ONZM has held some of the toughest jobs in sports administration in our corner of the world – from Netball NZ and the NRL’s Bulldogs franchise, to Rugby Australia and now Sport New Zealand.
In the latest episode of 'Grey Areas with Petra Bagust', Castle opened up about navigating some of the professional challenges she’s experienced: being a female in the public eye, managing high-stakes conflicts, and having the resolve to be a strong leader in a big organisation.
But she also got candid about some of the more personal difficulties she’s faced in life – namely her lifelong journey with alopecia and her experience with infertility.
Alopecia isn’t something Castle hides from those close to her, but publicly, she’s had to navigate the pressures of keeping up appearances in professional settings.
“If I had sat here today doing this podcast without my wig on, it would be really confronting for people. I look very different, and it’s not a core expectation of how a woman looks,” she told Grey Areas.
Her brother Ryan also has alopecia, but their experiences couldn’t be more different, she says.
“It's hilarious because he is a really handsome guy who totally owns and rocks not having any hair. He's got no eyebrows or eyelashes – although he's coming through a phase of having the odd eyebrow growing again, which is slightly odd – but he is not judged for that.”
For Castle, though, as a woman, there’s a different social expectation at play.
“Should I own that more? I do with my friends and family. I don’t do that with my business colleagues and my wider networks, because I don’t feel comfortable,” she told Petra.
She described the moment she first went public about her condition as one of the hardest things she’s done.
“It’s a big personal sharing detail. Initially, you think every single person you see is thinking, ‘Oh my gosh, she’s got a wig on.’ But now, I don’t even think about it.”
Castle hopes her openness about alopecia can help others.
“I do genuinely think it is another way that I could support a community of young women, who do have a different experience around alopecia than what men do. It’s not the same, it's a different hurdle, and I can says ‘This is how I've managed it and this is how you can still do what you want to do, this doesn't define the whole of you’.”
Castle also shared honestly about the emotional toll her infertility journey has had on her.
She and her husband Greg had wanted a family, and when they couldn’t get pregnant naturally, they tried IVF. But after one round, doctors warned that another attempt could make her seriously ill.
“Your chance of getting pregnant is probably about 5%,” she was told. “So I’m really not sure that’s for you.”
That moment was devastating.
“When you think your life’s going to be mainstream – you’re going to meet someone fantastic, want to have kids with them – and then they look at you and say that’s not going to happen... that’s a really, really big moment.”
Castle had two choices: “Either shrivel up in the corner and feel sorry for yourself, or say, ‘Right, I was clearly put here to do something else.’ And so I took that path.”
Despite not having children of her own, Castle and her husband Greg have leaned into relationships with their niece and nephew.
“My brother and sister-in-law have been deeply generous and understanding of us not having kids and how important the relationship with them is,” she said.
“We’ve had amazing experiences with them. We even took them to Disney World in Florida – an experience that, as parents, Ryan and Paula might have wanted for themselves, but they saw how much it would mean to us, and they let us have that.”
Castle says not being able to have children forced her to rethink what she wanted out of life – and in some ways, has shaped her leadership.
“You craft your story or your engagements because of the outcomes of not being able to have your own children. It means you’re looking for other ways to engage and support young people,” she reflected.
“I’m a great believer that connection into that generation is important to stay relevant and connected, particularly when you’re leading.”
Listen to the full podcast with Raelene Castle and plenty of other great interviews on 'Grey Areas with Petra Bagust'.
